It can happen: your child seems to prefer his nanny over you. This is especially true for working parents who rarely spend time with their kids. While it may sting a little bit, you shouldn’t be alarmed. Look at it from a positive point of view: that your child trusts the person he spends a lot of time with.
But don’t chill yet; you have some work to do to make sure that your presence as a parent is felt and remembered. To cope with this situation, we list down some helpful tips for you because at the end of the day, your child’s nanny is your partner in nurturing your little one and should never be considered as your rival.
#1 Don’t hold it against yourself and the nanny
Parents whose kids are closer to their nannies often feel bad about themselves. They think they are not doing enough as parents or are not spending enough time with their children. If you find yourself in this situation, remember that what you do—like going to work every day—are things you do for your kids. It’s normal for children to feel more comfortable with people they see often, much more the ones who take good care of them so don’t hold it against yourself and the nanny.
#2 Set aside quality family time
No matter how hectic your schedule may be, spending time with your kids is the only way to create a connection with them. Regardless of everything that you’re able to provide for them—education, toys, a comfortable life—physical presence and time well spent are still the best things you can give them. Start by making sure everyone’s home by dinner time or eat breakfast together every day. On weekends, you may want to schedule an activity that everyone will look forward to. This way, you get to bond with your kids regardless if you’re a working mum or dad.
#3 Work with the nanny
Nannies are not threats to your child’s love and attention; they’re your partners. They know the secrets that will make your child tick. Talk to them and work with them in helping you get closer to your child. Ask them how your child is doing, if there’s anything you can do to make their job easier. After all, having a nanny that you trust—and loved by your child—is hard to find. Also, should you need some me time to take care of yourself, you know you can count on the nanny to look after your little one.
#4 Don’t break promises
Kids love it when their parents assure them about something. But there’s nothing more painful for them than broken promises. To avoid tainting your relationship with your child, make sure to keep your words, especially if you want to make it up to him.
#5 Talk it out with your partner
Depending on how close or distant you feel with your child, consider talking about the situation with your spouse. Lay down options that could help both of you cope with the situation. Perhaps one or both of you have been working too hard, preventing you from spending time and connecting with your children. If family matters to you the most, reconsider your job and see if quitting or staying at home will help you get closer to your child.